Babies

It's not that I dislike babies. In fact, I harbor no bad feelings toward them. Congratulations on the new baby. Props to parents. I just wouldn't want one.

People are really disbelieving when I tell them that I honestly wouldn't want a baby. An older adopted child, maybe. But certainly not a wailing alarm clock. People tell me that "deep down, everyone wants a baby" and "you can never feel the same about an adopted child as you can about your own child" (which I believe is utterly untrue). I have never felt that "maternal instinct" toward babies.

Part of it springs from my natural squeamishness. You have to get blood tests and IVs and shots when you're pregnant, all so you can painfully eject a tiny, screaming mass from your body. Then there's the diaper changing, spitting up, and various health problems babies always seem to have. I always perceive them as being extremely fragile, too; whenever I hold one, I freeze up like I'm holding a raw turkey stuffed full of dynamite.

Maybe someday I'll adopt a child. I like kids, just not babies. I just wouldn't want to bring a baby into the world if I wasn't completely enthusiastic about it, or if I felt it would personally hinder me.

Mrs. Hilston would totally understand this.