While writing my latest blog post, I kept on thinking about my abysmal EQ score (5/20) and how my memory might relate to that.
Maybe I'm not as robotic as the EQ test would suggest. For example, I am unable to let go of the past. Not because I don't want to let go, but because I can't. So yes, sadness naturally recurs over certain subjects, and when I see someone I don't like I can't help remember why I'm angry with them in the first place. "Once my sobs have been released", I do not feel great because I still remember so clearly why I was sad.
Also, I have a hard time dealing with others' grief because in the past, I've made things worse while trying to comfort people. It's funny, but I'm defined by my past. I guess that's why my EQ test was so skewed-I have emotions and I can handle them, but old emotions float up to the surface so often that I have too many of them and end up just ignoring them.
Stupid memory!
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